I don't have any friends
Or people who care
Thus the lack of a live one
My necklace to wear
I once had a great aunt
Who did beadwork with glee
And she pinned and she taped
Her amazing jewelry
Thank goodness she made them
Cause forty years later
They're in this here contest
With no intent to abate her
I hope I've created
With these family jewels
A necklace quite ugly
And also followed the rules
It's meant to be worn
Admired or despised
They'll say they don't like it
But still everyone view
They'll all want to wear it
But no one will admit
Though hideous my necklace
Everyone covets it
It will bring them attention
Admiration and disgust
And so all of you judges
Will vote me I trust
With my winnings of baubles
I'll share all the wealth
For others to make some
Ugly stuff like myself
LIST OF INGREDIENTS:
(The order of items in no way reflects their degree of hideousness)
Old beads
Parts of 60's hip handmade jewelry by my great aunt Katie
Old mime doll neck piece
Broken superball in suet bag
Pipe cleaners, (glittered and non glittered)
Old hair curler and clasp
Broken candle
Old dirty cording and jute
Foam letter "J"
Electric plug
Decorative glitter bottle
Scotch tape
Coat hanger
Dirty artist clay eraser
Decorative piece of a roof shingle
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