The
Ugly Necklace Contest Some of the First Annual 2003
Entries, Click
for: Summary of Adjusted Judges Scoring Criteria ABOUT
THE JEWELRY DESIGN CRITERIA USED TO EVALUATE THE ENTRIES IN
THE UGLY NECKLACE CONTEST - It Ain't Easy Doing Ugly,
or as my momma says, "Ugly is as Ugly does." ABOUT
GOOD JEWELRY DESIGN JOIN
our On-Line
Forum |
Mary Poag, Murfreesboro, Tennessee
My Poem:
All that Glitters is not gold
AND Neither is this Necklace.
To wear this aweful tacky thing
You must be bold AND WRECKLESS.
[Mary would like everyone to know
that she can design non-ugly necklaces as well.]
Clasp Assembly: Tied into a knot
Dollar Value: Not Given
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
Jeannine McGuire, Powder Springs, Georgia
A long time ago when ethnic was cool, I started beading beads like a
fool.
I strung them all day and all night, and when I looked down it was
a site.
Round beads, flat beads, thick beads think long ones tall ones, they
all went in.
I was tired I was bead, I didn't have the energy to make it complete.
So here it sits in my box of things to do, I hope it wins a prize or
two.
Clasp Assembly: Tied
Dollar Value: $25.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
DeAnna C. McConnell, Ayer, Massachusetts
The Brass Rooster Did It!!!
The
bug-eyed rooster, he sits on my worktable.
He's brass stained with colors and he's ready and able
To have himself fastened to a pin or a brooch top...
He's waiting for HIS PROJECT upon which he'll hop.
His job to embellish (like a bit too much make-up)
To symbolize to all that it is high time to wake-up. ...
Clasp Assembly: Lobster Claw
Dollar Value: $75.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
M. Jean McHose, Bakersfield, California
Medicine / Magic Man / Woman
("Hoyeh! Hoyeh!")
Warrior wear this your amulet
of feathers, bones & beads...
Adorn your body, weave your
magic wherever it leads.
Thru rivers and plains and
mountains so high...
Nights filled with moons, bright
stars in the sky.
Chant your ancient spells &
wear this your animal charm...
for it will keep you safe...and
away from all harm.
These words of the past are
all that you'll need...
some stones and of course...
some wire and a shiny, shiny bead.
"Zahuah!"
Clasp Assembly: Tied
Dollar Value: $75.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 2 out of 7
Sherry Masters, West Nyack, New York
What A Chick
You
ask for ugly and
here's what -you-get,
A creature from my mind
That you ain't -seen-yet.
She's hot.
She's green.
With just a little faux.........
From a deep dark place that I really gotta show.
So, you ask what's ugly? Well, I don't know.
'cept she's no sinna.....
cause I'm da winna!
Clasp Assembly: Hand Fashioned hook/eye clasp
Dollar Value: Not given
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
Jacqueline McCloskey, Centerburg, Ohio
Cousin Carmen's Ugly Necklace Tribute
Cousin Carmen I told you
Your necklace was cute.
Your wore it with grace,
We wll thought you a hoot!
Then you smiled and
Placed it around my neck.
So I wore it all day
But felt like a wreck!
Cousin Carmen is gone
To heaven above.
So nice to have an ugly necklace
Given with such love.
Clasp Assembly: Button Toggle
Dollar Value: $50.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 2 out of 7
Patricia L. Multz, Anoka, Minnesota
What The....?
I bought many beads and charms
Acquiring quite a stash.
Most were really very nice
But others, ugly trash.
So on this wacky necklace
May be something bought from you,
But please don't get in a huff
I'm quite happy to be rid of my ugly stuff!
But now I was just thinkg
What the heck should I do with this?
I guess it should go to my mother-in-law
For her anniversary gift....
Clasp Assembly: Plastic hook/eye clasp
Dollar Value: Not given
Adjusted Judges Score: 2 out of 7
Angela Mens, Vadnais Heights, Minnesota
The 70's were a groovy time,
An era not remembered for their style.
And now a chance for me to wear,
A necklace I haven't seen in a while.
"Is that a vertebra hanging on your chest?"
"Why yes, it compliments my groovy vest!"
"And those...are they real animal incisors??"
"They sure are...don't you think they make me look wiser?"
This necklace has traveled many miles,
And at "Show and Tell" brought many smiles,
What were we thinking 30 years ago when we made this out west?
Certainly NOT "Let's keep this for a future internet contest."
Clasp Assembly: Tied
Dollar Value: From 0 to priceless sentimental value
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
Cindy Poliachik, Apex, North Carolina
"On the Fringe"
My Poem of Ugliness
Ugliness is a word,
Which describes,
This necklace perfectly.
With its raw amber,
and strings,
No one would wear it,
Without a scream.
Clasp Assembly: Tied
Dollar Value: $7.50
Adjusted Judges Score: 3 out of 7
Susan Reynolds, Lanham, Maryland
Kitchen Necklace
My Kitchen Necklace is a dandy, but -
you'll find it sadly -- not made of beads,
because I used stuff that was handy...
like plastic bags, spoons and those twisties.
I assembled a junky hodge podge...
now, but my work won't be ugly next time,
'cause I will shop at the Land of Odds.
If you choose my rubbish and my rhyme.
Clasp Assembly: Hand fashioned hook/eye clasp
Dollar value: $20.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 2 out of 7
(Not Pictured)
The necklace was a 24" strand of assorted colors of seed beads, with
a wire-wrapped cowrie shell pendant, about 3/4" in size.
Nancy Raen, Stoughton, Massachusetts
A Necklace That Says "Sensitive Guy"
You're a sensitive guy.
You eaat tofu and like to get high.
You bought this necklace - it was the one you picked
Because it's so effective at bagging you chicks.
Clasp Assembly: Tied
Dollar value: not stated
Adjusted Judges Score: 2 out of 7
Lori Stroner, Minnetonka, Minnesota
A Farscape Necklace
Scapers gather yearly from far and wide
Bringing trinkets or bobbles with pride
They are kept if too few
If many, some go to cast and crew
Each bead a symbol of devotion,
To a show always in motion
Farscape loved by a varied crowd
Displayed in colors bright and loud.
Clasp Assembly: Snap Clasp
Dollar value: $100.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
Karen Swaty, Owensboro, Kentucky
Undeniably tacky,
(even though it's well made)
Gag me green,
(with bugles, seed beads and Japanese glass displayed)
Less than lovely,
(when my kitty saw it, she was afraid)
It won't be seen....
(but could be worn by an alien in a Saint Patrick's Day Parade)
Ever gracing the neck of a queen.
(Since it's not made of diamonds but mostly crocheted)
So what is its purpose, is there any we can see?
To be UGLY, of course, so BEAUTIFUL can be!
Clasp Assembly: S-Clasp
Dollar Value: not given
Adjusted Judges Score: 4 out of 7
Nanette Talbot, Fulton, Illinois
Ode To A Necklace
Red and purple and pink and green,
You're the prettiest necklace I've ever seen.
Some may say you're a little loud
But hey, you stand out in a crowd.
To me you're worth a million bucks.
I'd never every say you suck.
You're big and bold and bright and true.
I could spend all day just lookin' at you.
Admirin' the way you glitter and tgleam,
You're a necklace to die for,
Every woman's dream.
Clasp Assembly: Barrel Clasp
Dollar Value: $5.36
Adjusted Judges Score: 1 out of 7
Jennifer Weigel, Affton, Missouri
The Cry of the Fashion Police
I cannot help but stare.
I don't want to seem rude,
But just how can one wear
A necklace so crude?
It does draw attention -
I will give it that.
I'd better not mention
In idle chit-chat,
My thoughts on the dangles
The beads and the pearls,
Gold hoops caught in tangles,
And sequins in whirls.
It's just not befitting
A woman so fairish
To be outside sitting
With beads oh so garish.
It's much too distracting
A necklace to don
With people reacting
To what one puts on.
The murmurs, the giggles,
And the double-takes,
As the necklace wiggles --
Fool of her it makes.
She looks far too funny,
So how does she fare?
Her mood seems so sunny -
Why doesn't she care?
Clasp Assembly: Interlocking hoops and beads
Dollar Value: $20.00
Adjusted Judges Score: 5 out of 7
